Patting her head, he turned to me, a heavy frown
furrowing his brow.
And spoke so low I barely heard him say, "Moya,
it's up to you now."
The very words I'd dreaded yet hadn't considered what
I'd do.
"I've done my best, all that I can - now the rest
is up to you."
I clutched onto the table as the room momentarily went
black.
Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes, and I
struggled to hold them back.
While she lay on that rocky table, I gazed into her
eyes.
And saw the pain hidden deep within - more than I'd
realised.
Unfocused though the brown eyes were, they pierced my
soul down low.
I swallowed over the lump in my throat as I spoke in a
choking voice.
"I give you my permission ... I really have no
choice."
Then bent down to her level and gathered her close to
me,
While the tears ran rampant from my eyes until I could
not see.
I felt him lift her paw up as the needle was inserted,
And then her life flowed smoothly out, and my bravery
deserted.
Some people cannot understand how heartbreaking this
time was.
That for so many tears and sleepless nights, a lowly
cat was the cause.
You simply cannot comprehend how this event could make
one weep.
Unless you've said the cold and lonely words:
"You may put
My pet to sleep ..."
(Moya Muldowney, 18th October 2005)
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