Top ten reasons my dog won’t use a computer

10. TOoop nii moo pa3wds … (too hard to type with paws)

09. “sit” and “stay” were hard enough … “delete” and “save” are out of the question.

08. Saliva-coated floppy disk refuse to work

07. Three words … Carpal Paw Syndrome

06. Involuntary tail wagging is a dead giveaway he’s browsing … www.purina.com

05. Fire hydrant icon … simply frustrating

04. Can’t help attacking the screen when he hears … you’ve got mail

03. Too messy to mark every web site he visits

02. Fetch command not available on all platforms

01. Can’t stick his head out of … Windows 95

 

(Dog Sports Magazine, December 1998 issue)