Jargon

Now, I know in every specialist field,

There’s a certain kind of patter,

To decide at length and make some sense,

Of things that really matter.

 

There’s computer jibe and hi-tec vibe,

It’s enough to make you reel.

But none of these brings unease

Like the "Doggie Person’s" spiel.

 

If you thought C.Cs were a kind of chip,

And B.I.G meant something large,

You’re not along if you feel confused,

To the novice it’s quite a barrage.

A "monorchid" is not an exotic flower,

"Close coupled" is not romantic,

"Lay back" is not an attitude,

It’s enough to make you frantic.

 

A "staring coat" is not a garment with eyes,

"Sway back" is not a kind of dance.

"Tucked up" is not what you do in bed,

"Set up" is not a fraud, but a stance.

 

"Undershot" isn’t a misfired gun,

And a "Gay tail" is not a nancy.

This terminology can be tough,

On those not of the fancy.

 

"Cow hocks" are not strictly bovine,

A "Good-doer" is not always a saint.

A "Down face" can often be cheerful,

If you think "smut" is rude, well it ain’t!

 

A "Shoulder" can sometimes be "Bossy",

A "Stern" can often be "High",

A "Stifle" should always be "Well bent",

But what on earth is a good "Second Thigh".

 

If you find this all too confusing,

Over you head and sick of the hype,

And you just want to baffle the experts,

Then say:

 

Ah! But isn’t he loaded with "TYPE"

 

By the Puppy Pen.

 

(Author unknown)