Willkommen / Welcome

Willkommen / Welcome
Um Gedichte zu lesen, wähle eine Kategorie (Sidebar rechts). / Select a category to read poems (sidebare right).

Wichtige Informationen / Important information:

Dieser Blog soll nicht nur eine Sammlung sein für alle, die wie ich Gedichte, Texte und einfach alles zum Thema Hund mögen, sondern auch eine Anerkennung für alle Autoren und Künstler, die uns mit ihren Werken große Freude bereiten, manchmal Trost spenden oder uns die Augen öffnen möchten für Missstände.

This blog is not only a collection for all of you who, like me, love poems, texts and simply everything about dogs, it is also intended to give recognition to all authors and artists who with their work give us great pleasure, sometimes solace and who also want to open our eyes to the abuse and neglect of animals.

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Ausgenommen meine eigenen Arbeiten, unterliegen alle in dieser Sammlung veröffentlichten Gedichte, Zitate, Geschichten etc. dem Urheberrecht des jeweiligen Verfassers. Leider ist mir dieser in den wenigsten Fällen bekannt. Ich möchte mich bei allen Autoren entschuldigen, die ich nicht namentlich erwähnt habe. Ich arbeite daran, die Autoren zu finden. Wer hier einen eigenen Text findet, dem wäre ich für eine Nachricht dankbar. Ich werde dann einen entsprechenden Hinweis (und/oder Link) ergänzen oder den Text umgehend entfernen.
Das Urheberrecht für meine eigenen Texte, Fotos und selbst erstellten Grafiken liegt allein bei mir. Kopieren oder jegliche Art von Weitergabe oder Veröffentlichung ist untersagt.

Copyright for all published poems, stories, quotes belongs to the respective author. Usually I don’t know the authors of the material and I would like to apologize to any authors who I don’t mention. I’m working to find the writers. If you do find your own work here, I would be grateful for an appropriate message. Then I’ll add a note (and/or a link) or will remove the text immediately. I look forward to hearing from you.
Copyright for my own writings, photos and graphics: Isa of Mayflower. Copying, spreading or any type of publication is prohibited.

2015/12/25

Death of a Judge

VCA Standard Operating Procedure:
Instructions on the Death of a Judge
Regulation NR.29, Section 6, Article #29 
 
It has recently been brought to the attention of the Committee of Management that many judges have been dying while on duty for apparently no good reason. Furthermore, these same judges are refusing to fall over after they are dead.
This practice must stop at once. Effective May 1, 1999, under regulation NR.29, Section 6, any judge found sitting up after he/she dies will be dropped from the Approved Judges List immediately without any investigation. However when it can be proven that said Judge is being supported by a Handler, Steward, or large dog, a ninety day grace period will be granted.

The following procedure shall be strictly adhered to and observed:

If, after several hours, it is noticed that a Judge has not moved or changed position, the VCA Representative will investigate. Due to the highly sensitive nature of our Judges and the close resemblance between death and their natural working attitude, all investigations will be made quietly so as to prevent waking of a Judge should he/she prove to be asleep in the ring.
 
If some doubt exists as to the true condition, extending to him/her, a cheque for Judging Fees will be the final test. If said Judge does not reach for it instantaneously it maybe correctly assumed that death has actually occurred. (Note: In some cases this instinct has been so highly developed that a spasmodic clutching reflex may occur. Do not allow this to confuse you.)
 
In all cases however, a signed statement SST.52 must be filed by the deceased Judge on a special form provided for this purpose. Five copies are required. Two to be sent to the VCA, one to the Judge and two to be lost in the bureaucracy.
 
All placements and championship points will be withheld unless an exhibitor can prove that said Judge was, in fact, alive when placement ribbons were awarded.
If death should occur during Group or Best in Show judging, a coin toss will determine the winner. If, because of the high cost of show entries, no coins are available on the show site, a preschool child will be chosen by the Show Manager to pick the winners. Either method could result in similar placements to actual judging.
 
(Author unknown; adapted from "The American Cocker Magazine", Winter Edition, 1997, Vol. 13, No. 3)

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