Why own a dog?

Why own a dog? There's a danger you know,

You can't own just one, for the craving will grow.

There's no doubt they're addictive, wherein lies the danger.

While living with lots, you'll grow poorer and stranger.

 

One dog is no trouble, and two are so funny.

The third one is easy; the fourth one's a honey.

The fifth one is delightful; the sixth one's a breeze,

You find you can live with a houseful with ease.

 

So how 'bout another? Would you really dare?

They're really quite easy but oh, Lord the hair!

With dogs on the sofa and dogs on the bed,

And crates in the kitchen, it's no bother you said.

They're really no trouble their manners are great.
What's one more dog and just one more crate?
The sofa is hairy; the windows are crusty,
The floor is all footprints, the furniture all dusty. 

The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care?

Who minds a few nose prints and a little more hair?

So let's keep a puppy, you can always find room,

And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom.

 

There's hardly a limit to the dogs you can add,

The thought of a cutback sure makes you sad.

Each one is so special, so useful, so funny,

The vet, the food bill grows larger, you owe money,

 

Your folks never visit; few friends come to stay,

Except other dog folks, who live all the same way.

Your lawn has now died, and your shrubs are dead too,

But your weekends are busy, your off with your crew.

 

There's dog food and vitamins, training and shots.

And entries and travel and motel which cost lots.

Is it worth it, you wonder? Are you caught in a trap?

Then that favourite dog comes and climbs in your lap.

 

His look says you're special and you know that you will.

Keep all of the critters in spite of the bill.

But winter's a hassle; the dogs hate it too.

But they must have their walks though they're numb and you're blue.

 

Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout

At the dogs on the sofa that refuse to go out.

The dogs and the dog show, the travel, the thrills,

The work and the worry, the pressure, the bills.

 

The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life.

They're charming and funny and offset the strife.

You're lifestyle has changed. Things won't be the same.

Yes, those dogs are addictive and so is the game!

 

*****

 

Another, slightly different version:

 

Why own a dog? There's a danger you know,

You can't own just one, for the craving will grow.

There's no doubt they're addictive, wherein lies the danger.

While living with lots, you'll grow poorer and stranger.

 

One dog is no trouble, and two are so funny.

The third one is easy, the fourth one's a honey.

The fifth one's delightful, the sixth one's a breeze,

You find you can live with a houseful of ease.

 

So how 'bout another? Would you really dare?

They're really quite easy but, oh, Lord the hair!

With dogs on the sofa and dogs on the bed,

And crates in the kitchen, it's no bother, you've said.

 

They're really no trouble, their manners are great.

What's one more dog and just one more crate?

The sofa is hairy, the windows are crusty,

The floor is all footprints, the furniture dusty.

 

The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care?

Who minds a few noseprints and a little more hair?

So let's keep a puppy, you can always find room,

And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom.

 

There's hardly a limit to the dogs you can add,

The thought of a cutback sure makes you sad.

Each one is so special, so useful, so funny.

The vet and food bills grows larger, you owe BIG money.

 

Your folks never visit, few friends come to stay,

Except other "dog folks" who live the same way.

Your lawn has now died, and your shrubs are dead too,

But your weekends are busy, you're off with your crew.

 

There's dog food and vitamins, training and shots.

And entries and travel and motels which cost lots.

Is it worth it you wonder? Are you caught in a trap?

Then that favorite one comes and climbs in your lap.

 

His look says you're special and you know that you will

Keep all of the critters in spite of the bill.

Some just for showing and some just to breed.

And some just for loving, they all fill a need.

 

God, winter's a hassle, the dogs hate it too.

But they must have their walks though they're numb and your blue.

Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout

At the dogs on the sofa who refuse to go out.

 

The dogs and the dog shows, the travel, the thrills,

The work and the worry, the pressure, the bills.

The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life.

They're charming and funny and offset the strife.

 

Your life-style has changed. Things won't be the same.

Yes, those dogs are addictive and so is the dog game.

*****
 

Another, slightly different version

Why own a Show dog? There's a danger you know.

You can't own just one, for the craving will grow.

There's no doubt they're addictive, wherein lies the danger

While living with lots, you'll grow poorer and stranger. 

One dog is no trouble, and two are so funny,

the third one is easy, the fourth one's a honey.

The fifth is delightful; the sixth one's a breeze.

You find you can live with a house full, with ease. 

So how 'bout another? Would you really dare?

They're really quite easy, but Oh Lord, the hair!

With dogs on the sofa, and dogs on the bed,

And crates in the kitchen, it's no bother, you said. 

They're really no trouble, their manners are great.

What's just one more dog and one more little crate?

The sofa is hairy, the windows are crusty.

The floor is all footprints, the furniture's dusty. 

The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care?

Who minds a few nose prints and a little more hair?

So let's keep a puppy, you can always find room.

And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom. 

There's hardly a limit to the dogs you can add.

The thought of a cutback, sure makes you feel sad.

Each one is so special, so useful, so funny.

The food bill grows larger, you owe the vet money. 

Your folks never visit; few friends come to stay,

except other dog folks who live the same way.

Your lawn has now died and your shrubs are dead too,

Your weekends are busy; you're off with your crew. 

There's dog food and vitamins, training and shots

and entries and travel, and motels cost lots.

Is it worth it, you wonder? Are you caught in a trap?

Then that favorite comes up and climbs in your lap. 

Her look says you're special and you know that you will

keep all the critters in spite of the bill.

Some just for showing, and some just to breed,

and some just for loving, they all fill a need. 

Winter is a hassle, but the dogs love it true,

And they must have their walks though you are numb and blue.

Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout

at the dogs on the sofa, who refuse to go out. 

The dogs and the dog shows, the travel, the thrills

the work and the worry, the pleasure, the bills.

The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life.

They're charming and funny and offset the strife. 

Your lifestyle has changed; things just won't be the same.

Yes, those dogs are addictive and so's the dog game.

 

(Author(s) unknown)